Day 5 and this is where I sit with ice on my foot. A couple of days ago, I told you about the surgery I had to remove a bunion and correct the structure of my foot. The second and third day of recovery weren’t a lot of fun, but each day gets better and better. I think the hardest part of all of this is just accepting the fact that I have to sit and let my foot heal.
Honestly, I believe God is using this time to allow not only my body to heal, but my mind and spirit to rest. Leading up to the surgery I had become so tired and weary.
Superman and Sam had gone to the farm a few Saturday’s back, but when he got there, he realized he had forgotten the keys…to the gate, to the barn, to the tractor. So he called frustrated and asked if I could run them over. I felt frustrated too. It wasn’t what I had planned to do. It’s a thirty minute drive and I had things already on my schedule. But of course I took the keys to him.
Although Superman said I didn’t need to stay, once I was there I knew I needed this. As he fiddled with stuff in the barn, I walked around. The fresh air helped me sort my thoughts.
At home, I had plans to clean out cabinets, stain the deck, and plant a garden. There were so many things to be done! But I was so tired.
I’m amazed at the speed at which we communicate, travel and get through life, but there are times when I just need to slow down. I want to grow my own food, drive a tractor and fill jars with jam and honey. Or maybe just sit and listen.
The grape vines are reaching for the sun.
Sam likes for me to walk with her around the farm. She’ll run far ahead of me, but then turn around to make sure I’m on my way.
Isn’t this guy magnificent? He’s so small and seemingly insignificant, yet God created him to look just like this and for a very specific purpose. In my busyiness and tiredness, I began to tell myself that this surgery wasn’t needed. I could walk, play tennis and even jump around a bit. For me to have to sit with my foot up for a few weeks to heal just seemed so…so nice. Guilt tried to tell me that I wasn’t worth having it fixed. I shouldn’t enjoy having time to myself to draw, read, write and maybe even nap. As I looked at this little bug, I heard myself thank God for such a beautiful creature. Then I heard God say “And I love you more than that bug.”
Sam and I walked some more. My tired mind started reminding me of the different friendships that have changed recently. In my weariness, blamed myself for not being more accommodating, more like them.
Then I saw this patch of flowers. One yellow dandelion amongst the daisies. A voice came to me and said “You are the yellow flower. You are exactly who I made you to be. Be you.” Friendships change. I don’t have to.
There’s my Superman. I needed this day. I stayed at helped clear the weeds along the fence line and pulled the grass from around the grape vines. I drove home sneezing my head off from the grass allergies, but I left with a clear mind and refreshed spirit. Now to heal this foot.